Family.
Blood thicker than water, they say.
Family is everything, they preach.
But what if family is nothing?
What if I never belonged?
Mother, sibling, grandparent, aunt, uncle, cousin—
What if not one of them cared?
What if the closest ones made me feel
Like a stranger in my own skin?
I’ve never had a family.
They’re just titles, nothing more.
To them, I am nothing—
Invisible, fading into the background
I watch people praise their families,
Share love that I’ve never known.
I stand on the outside, always feeling odd.
Where is this love they speak of?
But if I voice it, I’m called ungrateful.
They brought me into this world
(I never asked to be).
They provided what was needed
(But isn’t that their choice, not mine?).
They say it’s blood,
But mine feels like alien blood,
Flowing through a body never meant to be.
They are my blood, but love?
No, love was never something I felt.
I believe everyone deserves family’s love.
Most are blessed with it,
Some unlucky ones find themselves in orphanages.
And then there’s me—
With a family, yet feeling like an orphan.
Where do I go to find that love,
When the ones meant to love me
See through me like a ghost?
I’ve written before—
Of being the eldest, the burden I carry.
A daughter lost in the shadows,
Always alone, always unnoticed.
Love, they say.
But love was never spoken in my house.
Not with words, not with touch.
Their actions say they care,
But their eyes never meet mine.
I’ve been alone ever since I was a girl,
Sitting in the corner,
Yearning for someone to see me,
To feel my presence, to care.
I’ve lived with them
But never felt their warmth.
No sleepovers with cousins,
No vacations with laughter,
No family trips to bring us closer.
Just me, lost in a house of strangers.
So I stand here,
A body among bodies,
An orphan with a family.